"I had been trying to figure out how the strawberries got there after my frequent blackouts, and this book answered that question for me AND told me where to hide the bodies. Thanks Vanessa!
It would have been a five star rating, but it fails to explain the smell of brimstone whenever I open this book, or the man in clown makeup tied up in my basement. (Was the makeup there before I tied him up, or did I apply it? This question keeps me up at night) Still: if you have similar problems, this book is for you."
Oh my stars and garters... this phrase (in CAPITAL LETTERS!) is the title of a book. A real book! And you absolutely must read its reviews on Amazon.
"I had hoped this would have advise for handling situations where one finds strawberries on various parts of their anatomy. I've had strawberries on my buttocks for some time now and don't know what to do. Unfortunately this book focuses solely on the nipples. Hopefully the author will pen a followup."