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I was going to omit the end, but some of you may enjoy it: "Those solicited who choose not to participate shalt be labeled both publicly and widely as dastardly scoundrels, notty-pated hedgepigs, or beslubbering, doghearted, maggot-ridden canker-blossoms!"
And an old favorite, the Shakespeare insult generator, thou dissembling, doghearted boar-pig!