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  • We go to all the trouble of bumping off your last baggage only for you to marry something that looks like a boiled bagpuss.

    News Round Up

  • A parent, a wife, a hard worker..we all like to kick back on a Friday evening, whether my mates are muslim or 7th day adventists or worship bagpuss as the second coming.

    Preston Pals - The Battle has begun

  • PS - not that i want to sway the panal but I have been blogging since the beginning (under the orginal name of elmlea and elmleaquack until the new rules made me super bagpuss)

    BBC Blog Network


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  • Sexual Positions for Those No Longer Young

    Cathy Bryant
    Wergle Flomp Humor Poetry Contest 2015
    First Prize

    Too old, too old for reverse cowgirl
    or anything with the word "donkey" in it
    except for The Ambling Blackpooler.

    We make up our own dances for the divans:
    The Upturned Mouse, The Irish Potato,
    The Half-full Cup of Tea, The Tipsy Llama;
    The Sideways Organ-grinder, and this time
    it's your turn to be the monkey.

    They mustn't sound like cocktails or perfumes
    —the Tom Jones Semitone, for instance.
    Stick to The Chuckle Brothers Cha Cha Cha,
    Getting Right Into the Corners
    (an important one, that),
    The Disgruntled Librarian, The Belgium.

    Darling, darling, let's try—Servicing the Caravan,
    Polishing the Bevelled Edge, The Newt,
    The Plumber's Lunch Break, The Mothy Woollen,
    Happy Hour at the Gardening Centre,
    The Tiptoe Tremble with Tray,
    The Assembly Instructions in Japanese;

    The Summer Pudding, The Slip-on Shoe,
    The Countdown Conundrum,
    The Saggy Bagpuss Squish, The Torville & Dean,
    Bargain Hunt, The Antiques Road Show,
    The Reconditioned Hoover.
    Together we'll write The Saga Sutra.

    March 30, 2016