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  • "At the office Miss Reingold greeted me formally, neutrally and, I must admit, with secretarial aplomb. Her cold, ugly efficiency stimulated me to break new ground in our relationship.

    'Mary Jane, baby,' I said. 'I've got a surprise for you this morning. I've decided to fire you.'

    Her mouth neatly opened, revealing two precisely parallel rows of crooked teeth.

    'As of tomorrow morning.'

    'But - but Dr. Rhinehart, I don't under-'

    'It's simple, kneeknocker. I've been hornier in the last few weeks, want a receptionist who's a good lay.'

    'Dr. Rhinehart-'

    'You're effecient but you've got a flat ass. Hired a 38-24-37 who knows all about fellatio, post hoc propter id, soixante-neuf, gesticulation and proper filing procedures.'"

    - 'The Dice Man', Luke Rhinehart.

    February 4, 2008