Wordnik.com: Poetrie: The Deacon's Masterpiece, or the Wonderful One-Horse Shay

Wordnik.com: Poetrie: The Deacon's Masterpiece, or the Wonderful One-Horse Shay http://www.wordnik.com/lists/poetrie-the-deacon-s-masterpiece-or-the-wonderful-one-horse-shay.xml By Oliver Wendell Holmes (sr.?). Thanks to slumry for pointing out the link (a long time ago) to this. Have you heard of the wonderful <a href="/words/one-hoss shay">one-hoss shay</a>, That was built in such a <a href="/words/logical">logical</a> way It ran a hundred years to a day, And then of a sudden it -- ah, but stay, I'll tell you what happened without delay, Scaring the parson into fits, Frightening people out of their wits, -- Have you ever heard of that, I say? Seventeen hundred and fifty-five. <a href="/words/Georgius Secundus">Georgius Secundus</a> was then alive, -- Snuffy old drone from the German hive. That was the year when <a href="/words/Lisbon">Lisbon</a>-town Saw the earth open and gulp her down, And <a href="/words/Braddock">Braddock</a>'s army was done so brown, Left without a scalp to its crown. It was on that terrible Earthquake-day That the <a href="/words/Deacon">Deacon</a> finished the one-hoss shay. Now in building of <a href="/words/shaises">shaises</a>, I tell you what, There is always a weakest spot, -- In hub, tire, <a href="/words/felloe">felloe</a>, in spring or <a href="/words/thill">thill</a>, In <a href="/words/panel">panel</a> or <a href="/words/crossbar">crossbar</a>, or floor, or <a href="/words/sill">sill</a>, In screw, bolt, <a href="/words/throughbrace">throughbrace</a>, -- lurking still, Find it somewhere you must and will, -- Above or below, or within or without, -- And that's the reason, beyond a doubt, That a <a href="/words/chaise">chaise</a> breaks down, but doesn't wear out. But the Deacon swore (as deacons do, With an "I dew vum," or an "I tell yeou") He would build one shay to beat the taown 'n' the keounty 'n' all the kentry raoun'; It should be so built that it couldn' break daown: "Fer," said the Deacon, "'t's mighty plain Thut the weakes' place mus' stan' the strain; 'n' the way t' fix it, uz I maintain, is only jest 'T' make that place uz strong uz the rest." So the Deacon inquired of the village folk Where he could find the strongest oak, That couldn't be split nor bent nor broke, -- That was for <a href="/words/spokes">spokes</a> and floor and sills; He sent for <a href="/words/lancewood">lancewood</a> to make the thills; The crossbars were ash, from the the straightest trees The pannels of <a href="/words/whitewood">whitewood</a>, that cuts like cheese, But lasts like iron for things like these; The hubs of logs from the "Settler's ellum," -- Last of its timber, -- they couldn't sell 'em, Never no axe had seen their chips, And the wedges flew from between their lips, Their blunt ends <a href="/words/frizzled">frizzled</a> like <a href="/words/celery-tips">celery-tips</a>; Step and <a href="/words/prop-iron">prop-iron</a>, bolt and screw, Spring, tire, <a href="/words/axle">axle</a>, and <a href="/words/linchpin">linchpin</a> too, Steel of the finest, bright and blue; Throughbrace <a href="/words/bison-skin">bison-skin</a>, thick and wide; Boot, top, <a href="/words/dasher">dasher</a>, from tough old hide Found in the pit when the tanner died. That was the way he "put her through," "There!" said the Deacon, "naow she'll dew!" Do! I tell you, I rather guess She was a wonder, and nothing less! Colts grew horses, beards turned gray, Deacon and deaconess dropped away, Children and grandchildren -- where were they? But there stood the stout old one-hoss shay As fresh as on Lisbon-earthquake-day! EIGHTEEN HUNDRED; -- it came and found The Deacon's <a href="/words/masterpiece">masterpiece</a> strong and sound. Eighteen hindred increased by ten; -- "Hahnsum kerridge" they called it then. Eighteen hundred and twenty came; -- Running as usual; much the same. Thirty and forty at last arive, And then come fifty and FIFTY-FIVE. Little of of all we value here Wakes on the morn of its hundredth year Without both feeling and looking queer. In fact, there's nothing that keeps its youth, So far as I know, but a tree and truth. (This is a moral that runs at large; Take it. -- You're welcome. -- No extra charge.) FIRST OF NOVEMBER, -- the Earthquake-day, -- There are traces of age in the one-hoss shay, A general flavor of mild decay, But nothing local, as one may say. There couldn't be, -- for the Deacon's art Had made it so like in every part That there wasn't a chance for one to start. For the wheels were just as strong as the thills And the floor was just as strong as the sills, And the panels just as strong as the floor, And the <a href="/words/whippletree">whippletree</a> neither less or more, And the <a href="/words/back-crossbar">back-crossbar</a> as strong as the fore, And the spring and axle and hub <a href="/words/encore">encore</a>. And yet, as a whole, it is past a doubt In another hour it will be worn out! First of November, fifty-five! This morning the parson takes a drive. Now, small boys get out of the way! Here comes the wonderful one-hoss shay, Drawn by a <a href="/words/rat-tailed">rat-tailed</a>, <a href="/words/ewe-necked">ewe-necked</a> bay. "<a href="/words/Huddup">Huddup</a>!" said the parson. -- Off went they. The parson was working his Sunday's text, -- Had got to fifthly, and stopped <a href="/words/perplexed">perplexed</a> At what the -- Moses -- was coming next. All at once the horse stood still, Close by the meet'n'-house on the hill. First a shiver, and then a thrill, Then something decidedly like a spill, -- And the parson was sitting upon a rock, At half past nine by the meet'n'-house clock, -- Just the hour of the earthquake shock! What do you think the parson found, When he got up and stared around? The poor old chaise in a heap or mound, As if it had been to the mill and ground! You see, of course, if you're not a <a href="/words/dunce">dunce</a>, How it went to pieces all at once, -- All at once, and nothing first, -- Just as bubbles do when they burst. End of the wonderful one-hoss shay. Logic is logic. That's all I say. http://www.wordnik.com one-hoss shay http://www.wordnik.com/words/one-hoss shay Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:40:51 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/one-hoss shay logical http://www.wordnik.com/words/logical Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:40:48 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/logical georgius secundus http://www.wordnik.com/words/georgius secundus Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:56 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/georgius secundus lisbon http://www.wordnik.com/words/lisbon Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:51 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/lisbon braddock http://www.wordnik.com/words/braddock Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:49 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/braddock deacon http://www.wordnik.com/words/deacon Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:47 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/deacon shaises http://www.wordnik.com/words/shaises Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:44 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/shaises felloe http://www.wordnik.com/words/felloe Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:42 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/felloe thill http://www.wordnik.com/words/thill Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:39 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/thill crossbar http://www.wordnik.com/words/crossbar Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:28 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/crossbar sill http://www.wordnik.com/words/sill Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:26 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/sill throughbrace http://www.wordnik.com/words/throughbrace Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:25 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/throughbrace spokes http://www.wordnik.com/words/spokes Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:16 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/spokes lancewood http://www.wordnik.com/words/lancewood Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:14 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/lancewood whitewood http://www.wordnik.com/words/whitewood Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:12 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/whitewood frizzled http://www.wordnik.com/words/frizzled Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:06 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/frizzled celery-tips http://www.wordnik.com/words/celery-tips Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:03 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/celery-tips prop-iron http://www.wordnik.com/words/prop-iron Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:39:00 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/prop-iron axle http://www.wordnik.com/words/axle Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:38:58 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/axle linchpin http://www.wordnik.com/words/linchpin Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:38:57 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/linchpin bison-skin http://www.wordnik.com/words/bison-skin Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:38:55 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/bison-skin dasher http://www.wordnik.com/words/dasher Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:38:53 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/dasher masterpiece http://www.wordnik.com/words/masterpiece Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:38:51 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/masterpiece whippletree http://www.wordnik.com/words/whippletree Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:38:44 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/whippletree back-crossbar http://www.wordnik.com/words/back-crossbar Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:38:42 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/back-crossbar encore http://www.wordnik.com/words/encore Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:38:13 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/encore rat-tailed http://www.wordnik.com/words/rat-tailed Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:37:53 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/rat-tailed ewe-necked http://www.wordnik.com/words/ewe-necked Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:37:52 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/ewe-necked huddup http://www.wordnik.com/words/huddup Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:37:48 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/huddup perplexed http://www.wordnik.com/words/perplexed Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:37:43 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/perplexed dunce http://www.wordnik.com/words/dunce Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:37:40 +0000 http://www.wordnik.com/words/dunce