Definitions

from The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, 5th Edition.

  • noun The monthly flow of blood and cellular debris from the uterus that begins at puberty in women and the females of certain other primates. In women, menstruation ceases at menopause.

from The Century Dictionary.

  • noun The act of menstruating or discharging the menses.
  • noun The period of menstruating.

from the GNU version of the Collaborative International Dictionary of English.

  • noun The discharge of the menses; also, the state or the period of menstruating.

from Wiktionary, Creative Commons Attribution/Share-Alike License.

  • noun The periodic discharging of the menses, the flow of blood and cells from the lining of the uterus in females of humans and other primates.

from WordNet 3.0 Copyright 2006 by Princeton University. All rights reserved.

  • noun the monthly discharge of blood from the uterus of nonpregnant women from puberty to menopause

Etymologies

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Examples

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  • This is an actual letter from an Austin woman sent to Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph. It's PC Magazine's 2007 editors' choice for best webmail-award-winning letter.

    Dear Mr. Thatcher,

    I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts.

    But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I

    feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

    Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces

    violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?

    As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the

    bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying, jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my

    friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!

    The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants... Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so

    painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.'

    Are you fuc*ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of our tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James?

    FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

    For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or

    'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong', or are you just picking on us?

    Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your

    brand of condescending bullsh*t. And that's a promise I will keep.

    Always.

    Best,

    Wendi Aarons

    Austin , TX

    March 12, 2008

  • What did she win?

    October 8, 2008

  • I love XKCD.

    January 28, 2009